Going where no Star Trek series has gone before.



Bad news this week as it was announced Star Trek Enterprise is not being picked up after this season:

After four years, the mission is over for “Star Trek: Enterprise.” The prequel to the original “Star Trek” science fiction series will air its final episode in the United States on May 13, UPN and Paramount Network Television announced Wednesday.

I’m a big Enterprise fan, the series had some trouble out of the gate but, it really seemed to hit its stride beginning last season. I’m linking to a couple of articles regarding the cancellation:

Rick Berman, executive producer of UPN's now-cancelled “Star Trek: Enterprise,” recently said that Paramount is not shopping the series to another network to keep it on the air past its May 13 series finale.

and...

Scott Bakula, who plays Capt. Jonathan Archer in the series, was interviewed by Zap2it on the “Enterprise” set just hours before the cancellation was announced to the executive producers Tuesday night. But even before the announcement, Bakula said he wasn't confident the show had a future.

and...

Berman added: “I think the whole network had a big drop from before Christmas until after Christmas. I am not only very proud of the shows that we’ve done so far for the fourth season, but the shows that we’ve done that haven't aired yet are undoubtedly some of the best shows that we've produced. I don’t think it has to do with the quality of the show.”

and...

Should the affiliates be worried?

“As we look to the future, the UPN brand is stronger than ever,” Ostroff said. “We have a clear vision and direction for this network. In just the past year, we’ve seen ‘America’s Next Top Model’ emerge as a bonafide, homegrown hit for UPN, and our two new dramas, ‘Kevin Hill’ and ‘Veronica Mars’ have received more critical acclaim than any shows in UPN’s history. As a result of this success, the creative community has responded by making UPN a key destination for their top projects, producers and talent.”

Yeah, I’ve got UPN’s slogan for the fall ’05 season - UPN, The Network Where Good Shows Go To Die. I was thinking about whether or not I watched any of the other shows on UPN and I couldn’t think of a one outside of Enterprise. The last show UPN had which I’ve since discovered in late night reruns on Comedy Central is Dilbert. It’s another series that suffered from being on a sixth rate network. Funny as all get out but, something that never got the right time slot or exposure.

So, even though it may be a futile attempt, I’m putting these links and information out there — tell your friends and spread the word. It’d be a shame for another series as good as the original Star Trek to be cancelled:

IMPORTANT CAMPAIGN INFO! Do you want The Sci-Fi Channel to pick up Star Trek Enterprise? Write them NOW! Flood them with letters!

Sci-Fi Channel
1230 Avenue Of The Americas, NY, NY 10020

Write Sci-Fi Channel now - the more fans write in, the better!

We need to flood CBS, Viacom, Paramount and UPN with letters, phone calls, emails, and faxes.

FAX: YOU HAVE TO SEND IT THIS WAY OR IT WILL NOT GO THROUGH! PLEASE INCLUDE ENTERPRISE IN THE SUBJECT LINE!

Send your fax to: saveenterprise@interpage.net

You HAVE to have "Enterprise" in the subject line and nothing else or this will not go through. (minus quotation marks of course) You will get confirmation that it was received.

Mr. Leslie Moonves
Chairman and CEO - CBS Television
7800 Beverly Blvd., Los Angeles, CA 90036
1-323-575-2600

CBS Main Phone line: 212-975-4321

Sumner M. Redstone
Chairman and CEO - Viacom, Inc.
1515 Broadway, New York, NY 10036
1-212-258-6000

60 Minutes
55 West 57th Street,New York, NY 10019-2985
1-212-975-2006

Paramount Studios
5555 Melrose Avenue, Hollywood, CA 90038
1-323-956-5000

Call UPN: 1-310-575-7000

Call and write them all NOW! Flood them! Fax numbers and emails will be online soon!

I saw these recently and found them interesting - while the sampling group of each survey was relatively small in relation to the total number of employees the corresponding industry (100 in finance, 250 in government and 100 in hospitality) the gist of course is supposed to be superimposing these numbers over the industries as a whole. Now, I don’t know if that would really be an accurate assessment with such a small sampling group but, they are interesting figures nonetheless.

Forty percent of finance workers are counting on a new job in 2005. Dissatisfied with pay, workload and management, one-in-ten finance workers say they are looking for a new job on a weekly basis. The survey, “2005 Outlook: Finance Workers,” was conducted from November 22, 2004 to December 2, 2004 of 100 workers in finance.

and...

Thirty-five percent of government workers say they are ready to move on to a new job in 2005. While the majority of government workers say they are satisfied with their current jobs, one fourth say they are dissatisfied and looking for positions with higher pay and higher titles. The survey, “2005 Outlook: Government Workers,” was conducted from November 22, 2004 to December 2, 2004 of more than 250 workers.

and...

In search of better pay and career advancement opportunities and employers who are... well, more hospitable, 59% of hospitality workers expect to leave their current jobs this year. One third feel their employment prospects have improved in the last six months and 15 percent report they are looking for a new job on a daily basis. The survey, “2005 Outlook: Hospitality Workers,” was conducted from November 22 to December 2, 2004 and included 100 hospitality workers.

I almost think I should be listing a multiple choice question ala the SAT’s after these three links but, instead I just wonder what the implications are for Americans in the workplace. In all three surveys, there is mention of unhappiness with wages and I’m sure many of us recognize that it doesn’t seem as if wages are keeping up with expenses in our society. Still, there is the downward pressure placed on wages by companies outsourcing jobs overseas to places where labor costs are much, much cheaper.

Is the pendulum swinging back towards the American worker?

I don’t know, I kind of don’t think so.

I do think however we may be on the precipice of a time when there will be sweeping reforms in this country. There will come a point when things get worse and when they do, I think people will begin to make it their business to change the nature of work in this country.

Just a quick observation, scrolling down to the entry on the Yogasm. Just what is it Yogi’s doing in that picture? Copping the quick feel?

I got a new cell phone (and cell number) awhile back. This was only my third cell phone, me not being a big creature of change and all that. It would only be my second phone if I hadn’t inadvertantly lost the first. When I got the first phone it was something that was, well... a phone. Probably the best thing on the damn thing was Reversi which was my cell providers’ equivalent of GO.

The new phone is this really tiny thing, which looks more like a women’s compact. I still have some trouble with it. It takes pictures, I can program alarms into it so at least I’ll know in advance if I’m going to be late for something (useful for me).

Now comes a website, for all those people that actually surf the web with their phones. You can really get directions when you get lost in New York.

Being a guy, I know I’ll never wind up using it men never ask for directions.

Oh, if you have a big pipe (broadband) you can just watch Joe Klein on The Daily Show for yourself.

I caught Joe Klein on The Daily Show the other night and at one point, John Stewart observed he just couldn’t get Klein to break a smile but, given what Klein was discussing and the implications for the remainder of the second Bush term, I can understand as there really wasn’t anything to smile about.

Then after a little bit of searching, here are two interesting articles worth reading from the New Yorker’s website:

Seymour Hersch:

The Administration has been conducting secret reconnaissance missions inside Iran at least since last summer. Much of the focus is on the accumulation of intelligence and targeting information on Iranian nuclear, chemical, and missile sites, both declared and suspected. The goal is to identify and isolate three dozen, and perhaps more, such targets that could be destroyed by precision strikes and short-term commando raids.

and another interesting overview of the country by Joe Klein himself

Khatami, Khamenei, Khomeini, Rafsanjani: the names are easily confused by inattentive Westerners, who tend to have only two indelible images of post-revolutionary Iran—the furious visage of Ayatollah Khomeini and, in 1979, the blindfolded, stumbling Americans held hostage in the Tehran Embassy compound by radical students.

I’m hearing a new protest song in my head,

Khatami, Khamenei, Khomeini, Rafsanjani... let’s call the whole thing off!

Moon Rock? Well, sort of.



A 20-year-old man presented to the emergency room complaining of rectal pain. A well-nourished, well-developed man without signs of intoxication was admitted in no apparent distress. Digital examination of the rectum revealed a stony hard mass.

Just when you think you’ve heard everything, someone does something that surprises you. Courtesy of Warren Ellis.com

When bad retouchers strike!



I had a conversation last weekend with a bunch of people the gist being basically that anyone could take a few computer classes and work in my field. Which is true but, it doesn’t mean they’ll be any good. Then, I come across the gem above which is on the NYC.gov splash page - I don’t know what’s worse the fact that it’s such an obviously bad collage job or just the incredibly bad choice of source photos. Bloomberg looks like the Stepford mayor.

Good news of the week...

I went to my GP and found my blood pressure was near perfect and that I had lost fifteen pounds! I now weigh the lowest I have on seven years! When my doctor asked me what I attributed to this recent spate of health I was at a loss to discern the cause.

Then, it occured to me I hadn’t been working (haven’t encountered a bit of a slow period) for the last few weeks. So, the implication is that unemployment is a healthy state. Now if only I could get my wallet to buy into that I’d be set.

Possible definitions: (a) a type of yo-yo trick, (b) sex with Yogi Berra and (c) what Samantha has with a guy from yoga class.



Hall of Famer Yogi Berra has filed a $10 million lawsuit against TBS, claiming the cable television network sullied his name by using it in a racy advertisement for its Sex and the City reruns.

...but wasn’t Yogi a catcher? Sorry, just couldn’t resist.

They got Special Ops Cody, all is lost!



Quick! Hide your GI Joes!

The photograph purports to show a soldier called John Adams in desert uniform with a gun pointed at his head.

In a statement accompanying the picture, an Islamic group calling itself the Mujahideen Brigades claimed on Tuesday to have taken a US soldier hostage in Iraq.

It threatens to kill him unless Iraqis held in US-run prisons are freed within 72 hours.

My adventures with Doctor Mark...

So, this week turned into a pseudo medical week with lots of trips to various and sundry practitioners. One such trip was the semi regular foray down to the world of the Dental School.

I’ve been going to NYU Dental School for about a year now. This after having come to the conclusion it might be a good idea to get my teeth looked at. Part of the motivation in that decision was not having gone to my regular dentist in awhile. Part of the motivation was in thinking I would be out on the market dating soon, it might not be the worst idea to be out there with a mouth full of decent looking teeth (nice smile going a long way with the ladies).

So, I went down and got myself assigned to a student who wound up graduating and handing me off to two other students. Now here it is a year later and we’ve finished all the repair work due to decay and were set to embark on the next phase of the dental odyssey which will be reconstruction and restoration. Think of my mouth as some kind of large public works project - akin to a bridge or a highway and you begin to get the idea of the scope of things.

At one point I actually considered putting out public notices for bids for the work but reconsidered and thought the better of it.

So, I’ve been under the care of Jan and Mike my two dental students (a senior and a junior respectively) and I’II have to say I’ve been pretty pleased with the results. Going to a dental school instead of a regular dentist sounds like it would be an unwise decision, an observation which couldn’t be further from the truth.

The reason I stopped going to my last dentist is that I didn’t think he was doing a good job and finding a dentist isn’t an easy thing. So I procrastinated with the obvious repercussions. The thing I like about the dental school is that the students there are really concerned about doing a good job. Each and every time they delve into your mouth, they have to get a professors’ okay before doing whatever it is they’re going to do and when they’re finished it gets looked over by a professor and graded - imagine, my teeth being someone’s class project!

So, I’ve been enjoying the whole dental school experience and can’t recommend it highly enough. Getting back to Dr. Mark, so this week having finished all the ‘decay’ stuff, the next step was to see if I could get my case accepted by the cosmetic dentistry clinic. So, when I went in for my appointment with Jan this week, I was surprised to find instead of having another go round with the drill, we would be going to the other clinic and finding out what they thought.

The cosmetic dentistry clinic is in another adjoining building, so Jan and I made our way over there her carrying the model of my teeth in this little black suitcase (I didn’t know it was a model of my teeth on the way over but so what).

Well, walking into the cosmetic dentistry clinic was something like going from a Motel 6 to the Waldorf! Not that the facilities are bad at the clinic but where the clinic is a large common room broken down into cubicles and painted with this garish yellow color, the cosmetic dentistry clinic couldn’t be further from that. The color scheme was in these very elegant pale tones and with lots of wood accents. Instead of a series of cubicles in a large communal room, each patient has there own treatment room. Definitely, the luxury wing of the school complete with a little plaque outside each room stating who the magnanimous donor responsible for the beautiful facilities was.

So, there we were in the Shangri-La of the dental school, my student dentist Jan and I. We were supposed to meet with one doctor (professor) and as it turned out she was busy. Jan set me up in one of the rooms, prepping it for the exam , placing all kinds of tacky, sterile plastic on all the surfaces. She left to find a the person we’d be meeting with and while she was gone I took the opportunity to play with the chair.

See, Jan hadn’t been able to figure out how to get the chair to operate and once she was gone, of course I set about making myself comfortable by figuring out how to adjust the chair. Admit it, we all at one time or another have wanted to fool around with all those little do-dads in the dentists’ office (the water, the drain, the chair, the air thingee), the good thing about the dental school is that the students are still so new to all of it they don’t get pissed off by your playing with their toys. They’re still so new to the concept of poking around inside of someone’s mouth they’re just happy if you wind up doing something that makes you more comfortable and thereby makes it easier for them to work.

So, here I am fooling around with the chair. I get it to drop from its’ ridiculously high position, jump up and in (in my most graceful NASA astronaut way), and then proceed to get the back and height adjusted oh-so-well that I can nap a little if it takes a bit of time to find whoever it is were meeting with.

A few minutes later, Jan walks in trailed by another dental student and Dr. Mark who she introduces to me. Dr. Mark’s name even seems in keeping with the subdued and calming demeanor of the cosmetic dentistry clinic. I mean, of course what other kind of surname would he have? Dr. Mark. It makes perfect sense and then I begin to wonder if there aren’t a whole series of professors in the cosmetic dentistry clinic who have been blessed with surnames which sound like informal first names.

Doctor Mark is an Asian man who appears to be somewhere between his mid thirties to mid forties. He is not tall but seems impeccably groomed but, that’s not the most striking thing about Dr. Mark, oh no.

For when Dr. Mark opens his mouth, out comes the deepest, most basso FM radio voice. Dr. Mark has missed his true calling as an announcer somewhere - this much is certain within the first minute and a half of meeting him. Somewhere from deep inside this deceptive package issues forth this commanding, resonant voice which immediately reminds me of the guy who does all those voiceovers for every crappy movie preview I’m forced to sit through.

In this moment, I almost begin to hear Dr. Mark intoning, ”In a mouth... of despair. There lie teeth, in desperate need...” well, you get the idea.

Dr, Mark is very perfunctory though and quite businesslike, after introducing himself he gets right down to the business of picking and poking to see if my dental student Jan has a case worthy of the cosmetic dentistry clinic.

He picks away at my teeth, making the occasional comment about some discrepancy between his observation and what my chart shows. It is very quick, very brief. At one point, Dr. Mark picks up the model of my teeth and is inspecting it while showing Jan a proposed plan of treatment. While handling the model, something comes loose and one of the model’s teeth falls of at which I grab my mouth and bleat in mock pain.

Dr. Mark gets the joke, as does Jan and they continue pouring over the model. In too brief a time the consultation is over, Dr. Mark exits leaving the memory of his rather large voice behind and Jan and I make our way back to the normal clinic. Away from the world of muted colors, carpeted floors and hushed noises to the measured cacophony of the normal clinic.

Anyway, the upshot is I think I am winding up in the cosmetic dentistry clinic. Even if I don’t though I will not soon forget the voice of the infamous Dr. Mark.

Today’s celeb sighting:



Finishing up brunch with Roberta and Emma at the Miracle Bar and Grill I turned to see another New Yorker sitting across the room finishing up the bottle of water she was nursing. Looking like another person trying to get through a sleepy, overcast Sunday - I probably wouldn’t have noticed her if not for the telltale bobs (I don’t even know if that’s the right terminology) and the rather unusual, very ‘icelandic’ garb she was clad in.

Blog Sensei as Snow White naming the seven dwarves plaguing today’s office worker:

1. cranky

2. tired

3. cold

4. hungry

5. achey

6. overworked

7. stressed

Although, there is all likelihood she will not find humor in that statement given her current condition.

In an attempt to drive up the readership of my blog, I have focused on those two things that media outlets have come to realize will generate ratings, namely sex and sports. Having referenced women’s private parts, I can only now link to a humorous sports article:

And now the Yankee pledge of allegiance -

“I do solemnly swear allegiance to all things New York Yankee. That I promise to ridicule and belittle the accomplishment of any other professional baseball team and state unequivocally my pledge to believe in the inferiority of all other championship ball clubs, their franchise and their meager history. That winning one out of every four World Series establishes entitlement and if another team wins in our stead, it will be viewed as a fluke. That I recognize that year in and year out, it is for the good of baseball the New York Yankee organization spend like hell and whereas the Yankees shall continue their winning ways and dominate Fall Classics for decades to come, I will insist it isn’t because of Steinbrenner's money, it’s because other teams don't try hard enough and money has nothing to do with it. That I take this oath freely and without reservation, for the betterment of America and all things baseball.”

You never know where you’re going to wind up...

I was looking around SuicideGirls (trying to figure out if I want to sign up on the site or not) and you know how sometimes you find yourself just wandering around the web? You wouldn’t have sought out something but, through a series of clicks you find yourself taken to a place. I used to do that with the car a lot, just get in and drive somewhere and explore, now I do it on the “info highway” (ouch, what a hackneyed use of a really overused cliché).

So, click - I’m here, click - I’m there. First it’s some members’ link and then on to some obscure blog and then some fetish photography and then some studio’s website and before you know it, I wind up here:



And I find myself just fascinated.

Sure, I imagine there’s an underlying lurid aspect of the fascination but, overall it’s just the amount of dialogue that is impressive. I don’t know if I’ve ever seen such an interesting compendium on this subject. Between the first time stories of both men and women, to ob-gyn experiences and just plain talk in general - I found myself just “wandering” around for a bit of time.

The Flashmob



Everyone in this picture is now (I believe after January 8th) breaking the law and subject to arrest - even the little girl in the center of the picture. Damn criminals, you just can’t escape them anywhere!

Find out what they are doing and why here.

Wouldn’t it be nice?


If you click on the image, you’re directed to the petition to Mayor Bloomberg.

The very best solution to the currently overcrowded sidewalks is a vastly improved pedestrian environment, coupled with a free-flowing transitway. The vitality and intensity of New York derives in large part from its very human scale of circulation and activity. People from all over the country, not to mention the world, come here to experience this and are often amazed at how much they like it. We believe this intensity should be encouraged and enhanced. The act of taking the cars out of 42nd Street would, in effect, be converting the scale of the street from the automotive, back down to human scale, and would open up tremendous new possibilities for the complete redesign of the street.

One of the best movies I’ve seen in a long time - if you haven’t seen it yet do go because it’s certainly worth it.

A recent purchase

Interesting to note if for a few reasons:

First off, I never cease to be amazed by my own capacity to delight in looking at naked women - a quality which doesn’t seem to diminish over time as I thought it would. One of the things I always liked about drawing class was just simple appreciation for the naked form.

Second, I like the book because so much of the focus in society today is an image of perfection and this book runs counter to that. Not to say the women contained within aren’t absolutely beautiful but, they don’t fit easily into the wafer thin, model perfect physique that is held up to women in this country as an ideal.

Women are just beautiful.



Quite a few of the women would be unspectacular if you met them on the street (although many of the subjects were quite attractive). But it's the level of emotionality that they all convey without their clothes that makes this treatise remarkable. Each woman is beautiful in her own way. And on that level, the book is very successful.

A career-spanning art exhibit, The Will Eisner Retrospective will open at MOCCA (Museum of Comic and Cartoon Art) in New York City in May 2005, followed by galleries at Brigham Young University in Provo, UT, The University of Massachusetts in Amherst and possibly additional venues.

Will Eisner died January 3, 2005, following complications from open heart surgery.

Yo! Yo! Yo! Check Ke out... doing the guitarist thing!



upcoming shows:
01.21.05 friday [@11pm] The Trash Bar 256 Grand St, Williamsburg, Brooklyn
02.18.05 friday [@10:30pm] Ace Of Clubs 9 Great Jones Street, LES, NYC

You can listen to the bands’ music via this link, fun stuff and of course the Ke man is über-cool!

Odd things...

I heard something the other day so disturbing, it actually induced a physical reaction. I honestly would have never thought such a thing possible. After I heard the news, my stomach actually cramped up for a couple of hours through the night. I also succumbed to a rather pleasant bought of something named after a Mexican idol. Two days and counting and my stomach is still unsettled by it - I never cease to be amazed by these things.

WOW! THEY FINALLY DID IT!

At work? Bored? Dreary day?

Click here for your amusement.

He will be missed:

He is fortunate indeed to have been a steadily working actor since the age of 20, He made his first film appearance in the Manhattan-filmed low budgeter Cop Killer (1958). In 1960, he created the role of flamboyant interlocutor El Gallo in the off-Broadway smash The Fantasticks.

Another New Years Eve is upon us, I find myself sitting watching Law and Order and eating Mexican food...

...and not being particularly bothered by it either.

Last year I found myself having a wonderful dinner in the garden of a great Italian restaurant down in Key West. The company was fine and the weather absolutely terrific - it was the first time I had been on any kind of vacation lasting more than two days in over six years, needless to say it was rejuvenating.

This year when it came right down to it, I didn’t really feel the urge to go out and celebrate much. It hasn’t been the greatest of years but, I find myself hard pressed to really sum up the year as horrid - surprisingly enough as each year passes I find it really takes a lot for me to classify a year as horrific after remembering some of the things that have been thrown my way.

I am thankful I have some kind of perspective.

However, closing the book on 2004 won’t be a hard thing to do, ever the optimist I always look at a New Year as something burgeoning with nothing but potential for wonderment and I have no reason to believe 2005 won’t be the best of years.

And of course, that is my wish for any of you. So dear reader, please accept my most heartfelt wishes for the greatest successes, the most tremendous joys and the most complete happiness in the coming year - we can do little to change our pasts but the future is one thing we can surely influence and I wish you and yours the best in the coming voyage of our planet around the sun.

Happy New Year.

The numbers game:

Lots of things in the news about Tsunami deaths - Tsunami Death Toll Soars Past 117,000

BANDA ACEH, Indonesia - Pilots dropped food to Indonesian villagers stranded among bloating corpses Thursday, while police in a devastated provincial capital stripped looters of their clothing and forced them to sit on the street as a warning to others. The death toll topped 117,000, and officials warned that 5 million people lack clean water, shelter, food, sanitation and medicine.

Okay, as bad as nature did to the human race last weekend, here are some sobering numbers for you to put things into perspective:

800,000

In "Ghosts of Rwanda," airing April 1, 2004, at 9 P.M. on PBS (check local listings), FRONTLINE® and the BBC mark the 10th anniversary of the Rwandan genocide — a state-sponsored, 100-day massacre in which some 800,000 Rwandans were methodically hunted down and murdered by Hutu extremists as the United States and international community refused to intervene. Through interviews with key government officials, diplomats, survivors of the slaughter and even some of the genocide's perpetrators, the two-hour documentary offers groundbreaking, eyewitness accounts of the genocide.

2.400,000

Out of a 1970 population of probably near 7,100,000 Cambodia probably lost slightly less than 4,000,000 people to war, rebellion, man-made famine, genocide, politicide, and mass murder. The vast majority, almost 3,300,000 men, women, and children (including 35,000 foreigners), were murdered within the years 1970 to 1980 by successive governments and guerrilla groups. Most of these, a likely near 2,400,000, were murdered by the communist Khmer Rouge.

Seems no matter how much of a hit nature can put on our asses, it’s no match for the horrors we can visit upon ourselves — the remarkable thing is that when moments like these happen, instead of their being an outcry and loads of support being offered up to the savaged populations, we generally keep mum.

Kind of makes you wonder, doesn’t it?

My phone talks to me.

No, really. I’m not insinuating I hear voices or have gone around the bend (although I’m sure they are people I know who would argue the point) - I just changed over cell providers and also got a new phone in the process. The new phone which is half the size of the old one and fits very nicely into my pocket, also has this very disarming feature.

I can be in another part of the house and all of a sudden hear this mechanical if slightly female voice say, “Call from... (insert caller’s name here)... ” and then they’ll be this beep after which the whole thing starts all over again. The first time it gives you the option of whether you want to take the call or not - you can actually just say “yes” or “no” and it either answers the call or puts it directly through to voicemail.

The thing takes pictures. I can send email from it. Get email on it. Record little memos to myself. Set up a calendar with reminders when I’m supposed to be somewhere. It’s really quite the amazing little device.

I’m still trying to figure out why the default voice is female. It probably is a commentary on sexism in our society that the default voice on my phone sounds like a woman instead of some burly, macho man or even some english sounding butler for that matter.

Anyway, the more things I program into the damn thing (people’s names and email addresses), it seems the more it can do. So, I guess I’ve finally taken the leap into the world of science fiction. It may sound like I’m overstating things a bit but, when I was a kid I can remember reading Dick Tracy in the Sunday color funnies (Dick Tracy getting prime position on the first page with Dondi) and being awed by the two way wrist radio Dick Tracy had.

Overnight it appeared all the payphones vanished and everyone began walking around with a cell phone plastered to their head. And they keep getting smaller and smaller. I figure we’ve got a little more than a decade when they’ll be planting a chip set with a speaker just under the skin behind your ear and a small microphone implanted into the skin of your cheek. No more messy phone to carry around with you - no more worry about losing the stupid thing.

Which makes me think about this thing that happened recently...

There’s this woman (I was going to say girl but I caught myself), who I just think is the most beautiful thing imaginable. This happens a bit with me, the whole being awestruck by the beauty of some women and just feeling totally intimidated by it.

So, not too long ago she dropped her cell phone.

Sure, everyone drops their cell phone you’d say but, do you drop it in the toilet? The thing was in her back pocket and well for a sense of decorum I think you can imagine the rest. At least she didn’t compound matters by flushing the thing. Needless to say, the phone really wasn’t working after that.

I think the day comes people are getting those implant thingies - she may wind up being in the front of the line. In the meantime, I find myself somewhat less intimidated by the beauty these days, knowing that we’re all susceptible to a D’oh moment.

There are a lot of things involved in my day to day life that people don’t have the slightest idea of. Then again, I rarely have a clear picture into other peoples’ lives outside of what they choose to share with me.

I roll into work around the same time every day. It’s the same time I’ve been getting into work for the last seven or eight years actually. Every day I try to get in early but, I don’t have a great reservoir of energy and that morning time is precious.

It’s usually in that first hour or two after I get up that I have the most energy and can accomplish much, much more than I ever can in the evening. Part of it is just being refreshed after sleeping and another part is not yet having the weight of the day or my life bearing down upon me just adding to the burden of what needs to get done.

Plus, of course there’s the unbearably long commute. No matter how many times I describe it, it just never seems to ‘stick.’ There’s the drive, then the train ride, possibly the subway and the walk a series of dominoes where if any one part doesn’t fit just so, it can set all the others out of kilter, increasing the amount of time and the tension level to the start of the day.

In recent years, a few friends have taken the plunge and moved from their commuter friendly addresses (read Williamsburg) to the hinterlands. They’re not by me but, now have a comparable commute. So, there’s a certain wry satisfaction I get when I hear them bemoan the lack of sympathy they get from co-workers when they try and describe their two times a day trek to their peers.

Yes, if the stars are aligned and everything works out perfectly it’s a beautiful thing but, most often it’s not. After awhile, while I do still care about it, I‘ve become numb to getting excited about it anymore when things don’t go the way they should - it has more to do with keeping my sanity in a less than perfect world.

Outwardly, I think people confuse my numbness to the issue as indifference or a lack of regard but, again I don’t think they have a fair understanding of the situation (walking a mile in my shoes and all that).

Plus, this business being what it is, it seems I rarely get out at the time I’m supposed to. I can’t begin to reckon the number of times I’ve been corralled in that last half hour of the day to deal with some urgent matter because somebody has come to realize I’m about to leave - never ceases to amaze me.

Anyway, part of that whole daily routine is the household chores. Being in the situation I’m in, it’s more a matter of making sure things are done or finding them becoming much, much larger things to have to deal with. People with children have some say in the matter but, when dealing with an aging parent you get very little in the regard of say plus, you’re fighting the eccentricities that accompany the progression of the years.

So, tonight when I was looking around for a heating pad for my neck and was told I could find it in the EYOC’s room in a drawer I guess I should have been far from surprised to find that a frying pan along with it’s lid had taken up residence in the bottom drawer of one of the night tables.

I mean, I can’t imagine there isn’t anyone among us who hasn’t awoken from a sound sleep in the middle of the dead of night with a sudden urge to fry something?

We all have those strange cravings, don’t we? Two o’clock in the morning rolls around and I sit bolt upright in my bed stricken by the compulsion to make french fries and of course at that moment I certainly don’t want to be fumbling through a kitchen cabinet looking for pans. Maybe even fry up a nice fillet of flounder, wouldn’t that be yummy?

Does this even begin to compare with the hemming of the pants with the common office stapler? Or the home repairs done with the Swingline office model?

No, but it ranks right up there with them.

Over the last several days it has come to my attention people read this thing — imagine my surprise!

I’m still trying to get around to really writing - the reason I started doing the blog thing was I found great enjoyment by reading my blog sensei’s thoughts and also I was listening to an interview with David Sedaris. The interviewer asked about his writing habits, how much, how often and Sedaris noted he wrote every day although it wasn’t always fiction. He considered just the act of writing (whether it be a note to a friend or a journal entry or an actual story) enough.

The comment got me to thinking.

I have a number of projects I’ve wanted to get around to finishing (two short films, a children’s book, three comic book stories, two books - one fiction, one non-fiction and a board game). The thing is, I keep finding myself too preoccupied to actually get around to putting in the work to completing these things.

I just wind up getting caught up in the daily routine... and that’s really a bit of a problem.

See, I’ve got to figure I’m never really going to get ahead, or get anywhere for that matter if I keep letting it happen... work has a tendency to do that to me. By that, I mean it’s a bit distracting which made me come to an epiphany of sorts — I needed to get started writing, if only to exercise the muscles, so that’s why I wound up starting the blog.

Hopefully, by the time I do get around to actually putting something down, the writing muscles will be in tip top shape.

Can a Tsunami happen here?!?!?

Why is it every time some kind of disaster happens somewhere around the world, the first thing all the talking heads do is focus our attention on it for several days straight and try to couch the whole thing on whether or not it will happen to us?

So, the story du jour is the Tsunami. Anybody want to take odds on how long this story occupies our collective consciousness? I figure it’ll be about two weeks, about the time it takes for everyone to get tired of all that vacation video of the big wave. I’m a cynic, what can I say.

I really like the fact on a couple of tonight’s newscasts, the newscasters were broadcasting from the scene and observing that little had been done to remove the dead and rotting corpses. One comely looking lass, commented on the reek from a decaying corpse and opined it was disgusting...

How could these people not cleeeeaaaannnnn uuuuupppppp?!?!? (you’ll just to have to try and imagine the annoying whine of her voice)

It’s real fun watching a natural disaster occur in a second or third world country viewed through the prism of the first world newscaster. Never mind the governments in many of the stricken nations have a big enough problem just delivering basic services like clean water, housing and a sanitation system - yeah, they’ll get right on that thing with the bodies lady.

I have my own problems with the guy from the UN and his statements. While I can understand he’s motivated in a purely humanitarian way - anything even remotely coming out of the UN these days in the way of moral indignity I view with a certain jaundiced eye. Then again, since were all supposed to be unto gods ourselves (the human race that is), always somewhat amazing when we find that the natural world isn’t buying into our bullshit - it’ll make me think twice before the next time I take out one of those ever prevalent ant hills.

You had to know it was only a matter of time before someone got around to blaming Georgie Junior:

Indian Minister of State for Science and Technology Kapil  Sibal said,  “If the country had such an alert system in  place, we could have warned the coastal areas of the  imminent danger and avoided the loss of life.”  But there  is no room in the Bush budget for such life-saving measures; the U.S. government's priorities are corporate  profit and endless war.

At a meeting of the UN Intergovernmental Oceanographic  Commission in June, experts concluded that the “Indian  Ocean has a significant threat from both local and distant  tsunamis” and should have a warning network. But no action  was agreed upon. Geologist Brian Atwater of the U.S.  Geological Survey said, “Sumatra has an ample history of  great earthquakes, which makes the lack of a tsunami  warning system in the Indian Ocean all the more tragic. Everyone knew Sumatra was a loaded gun.”

Things to do while you’re bored - NUMBER 5,109,382,416

Results 1 - 10 of about 1,100,000 for WORLD OF PJ - 0.11 sec. (About this page)

So, it turns out the blog is someting like the fourth thing listed on the page. I was wondering if you could even find the damn thing if you didn’t know the url!

I like this though, a German site which I can’t understand at all since I don’t speak German.

Yesterday, I was talking about how much I worry and it’s true I wind up worry way more than I should.

Today, I’m at work again - third day in a row and totally bored out of my mind.

It’s weird being ‘the freelancer’ at times. On the one hand, there’s this very real ‘putting out the fire’ mentality that goes along with being a freelancer. Usually, clients aren’t going to be inclined to call you in just so you can sit aroud all day and bill downtime. Those days (if they ever existed) are long gone. When you are called in, it’s usually to deal with the ‘crisis du jour,’ something so truely nasty, mindless and painful that the client balks at sacrificing a full time employee on the altar of the project.

It’s graphic arts 9 - 1 - 1. We need that project on a CD to go! Stet!

Anyway, if it really bothered me I imagine I would change jobs but, I don’t. I just keep waiting for the latest emergency. Then again, it also means when I do go and work onsite for a client, I’m prepared for things to be totally out of control and the exception is when they aren’t...

...and it can be maddening.

I don’t really have much of a problem ‘goofing off’ (is there anyone who does?), I’m just less than thrilled when I’m in the position where there’s nothing to do and somehow I am supposed to look busy. The look busy part isn’t something I like to do. Look busy means surfing the web is not such a great idea, working on something of your own while you wait would generally be frowned on and just going out for a coffee run sends the wrong message.

Then, I think about and want to chide myself! This is what I have to complain about?!? I’m getting paid to look busy!

What a wussy I am sometimes.

Amazon.com has a series of short films currently posted on their web site - you’re going to need bandwidth to view them but, out of the five, three are certainly worth viewing.

Check out:

Tooth Fairy featuring Chris Noth

and

Do Geese See God? featuring Blair Underwood

and my own personal favorite -

Portrait featuring Minnie Driver

I’ve been managing about one blog entry a week the last few weeks. I guess blogging runs in cycles more or less and this is one of those less times.

I’m never really sure if anyone reads the damn thing so, I don’t worry so much about it. Which is unusual...

...because I actually spend a great portion of my day worrying. I worry about work-whether I have it, if I have it whether I’ll keep it, if I’ll get it done, if I’ll get paid, when I’ll get paid, if I’ll do a good job, if I’ll get there on time, if they’ll be mad if I don’t, what I’m not getting done while I’m at work. I worry about my health-what that pain was, if my blood pressure is too high, if I’m eating right, how much I weigh. I worry about my social life-about getting a girlfriend, about finding a girlfriend, about keeping a girlfriend, if I’ll always be a bachelor, why people don’t call, if I feel comfortable talking to the people who do call, how I come off, how I’m perceived, what I project. If I’m getting things done, if I’m not.

Yes, it’s just a world of worry.

At the end of the day it manages to get me little (other than a few more gray hairs), it’s a habit I’ve so far tried to break myself of (unsuccessfully so) and I keep waiting for that magical day when I will wake up and find myself in some semblance of inner serenity.

Man, if there was one thing I could get for Christmas, that would be it.

In the spirit of that - and the constant struggle to put things in perspective, I post this link, my lame gift to you.

I took another listen to one of my favorite stories, you need Real Audio to listen in but, it’s really worth it.

A parable of race and politics in America. The story of Chicago's first black mayor--and the chaos that broke loose in Chicago politics when he took office. If you've never heard the hilarious, inspiring voice of Harold Washington, you're in for big treat.

“I’m in labor.”

“Go pee.”

“Breathe.”

“Blow.”

These are the only four things, I am assured by our birthing class instructor, that I need to remember when going to the hospital to have a baby. I wrote them down on a pamphlet she gave me so I wouldn't forget, and posted it on the refrigerator when I got home. I looked at several times a day for more than two months. I would not forget when the time came.

My friend Mark with his very unique take on becoming a daddy. Very funny reading and well in keeping with Mark’s matter-of-fact view on things.

Embracing my inner geek...

No poetry has been written about it, as Hart Crane did with the Brooklyn Bridge. No songs have been written about it, as Paul Simon and Art Garfunkel did with the 59th Street (Queensboro) Bridge. No one ever attempted to sell this bridge. Indeed, before it was ever completed, the span was described by John DeWitt Warner as a "surrender of the City Beautiful to the City Vulgar." While not renowned for its beauty, the Williamsburg Bridge has fulfilled its original mission to relieve traffic congestion on the Brooklyn Bridge, and to serve as an important link between Manhattan and the Williamsburg section of Brooklyn.

A link to one of my favorite sites with all the history and arcane lore of the New York area.

Around the bases - commentary on the world of Baseball File this item under the world’s most expensive blowjob: Neagle, who has not pitched in more than a year because of injuries, was pulled over Friday in suburban Lakewood for allegedly speeding. Police said a woman in his car told them he had paid her $40 for oral sex. Colorado Rockies pitcher Denny Neagle, shown in this Match 6, 2002 file photo, was cited Friday, Dec. 3, 2004, on a charge of soliciting a prostitute after a woman in his car said he paid her $40 for oral sex, police said. Neagle, who has not pitched in more than a year because of injuries, was pulled over at about 1:30 a.m. in this west Denver suburb fo Lakewood after an officer saw his white Cadillac Escalade speeding, police spokesman Steve Davis said. After the officer asked Neagle why his belt was unbuckled, the woman said Neagle had paid her for sex, Davis said.(AP Photo) This little lapse in judgement will wind up costing Neagle millions if he Rockies have their way. ...and speaking of teams throwing their money around...

Wow, first hurdle of the holiday season is past us! Hooray!

Thanksgiving has come and gone.

The requisite large dinner was fine - the three day bout with food poisoning wasn’t. Everytime I get sick reminds me of how fortunate I am to be relatively healthy most of the time.

Ah, I can see it now: THANKSGIVING! THE MOVIE! A holiday resulting in more trips to the bathroom than a week’s vacation to Mexico.

I was supposed to go away and then at the 11th hour changed plans out of some misplaced sense of guilt - well, maybe I’ll take a long drive later this month, who knows.

I haven’t written a lot lately because I’ve actually been busy as all get out trying to get things done - I’m soon to be the beneficiary of a bigger pipe (DSL) and truthfully I can’t wait. Plus making the migration over to new machines, wiping and trashing the old is turning into quite the bit of work.

Plus, I can feel another great adventure on the horizon... dating! I finally find myself having the urge to date again.

More as it happens.

Oh, and another reason I stopped writing was because of the crummy election and all the stupid fallout from it. It finally culminated in an email battle that cost a friendship (it had to happen and I’m sure I’m not the only person it happened to). Just didn’t make me feel like writing much about anything.c

Oh, and one other thing while I’m at it (and this is mainly because Mike told me I was two for two.

Now you have to imagine this in John Sterling’s voice:

The Yaaaannnkkkkeeeeesssss llooooossssseeeee!!!!!

The Yaaaannnkkkkeeeeesssss llooooossssseeeee!!!!!

The Yaaaannnkkkkeeeeesssss llooooossssseeeee!!!!!

I imagine whatever the fates had determined in regard to the election, they gave New England something to feel good about.

The Yankees - the first team in baseball history to lose a seven game series after being up 3 to nothing. Stick that alongside those 26 World Championships Yankee fans!

The biggest choke in baseball history!

That’s what the biggest payroll in baseball got you this year:

CHOKE!

On behalf of Mets fans everywhere - we knew you had it in you. Thank you for giving us what we need to stop you guys from ever crowing about your team again.?

I haven’t written in awhile now. It’s been a busy time and as much as I have to say, I wanted to give myself the time to clarify my thoughts.

Over the last week or so, since the election I’ve gotten a few angry emails from people about how dissatisfied they were by the outcome - I actually probably lost a friend over this stupid election (more on that another time).

So, since it seems to be a bit of a preoccupation with some people, let’s talk about the election.

Should we couch our conversation in the simplest of terms? Should we break everything down to “red states” and “blue states?”

I guess it all depends on just how ‘stupid’ one wants to be about the whole thing.

Yeah! That’s it! It’s those goddamn red states! No, it’s the fucking blue states - they just don’t get it!

Is this what the level of political discourse in this country has sunk to? Seems like it.

To take the tact of the patron saint of the Democratic party, “I feel your pain.” All the Democrat supporters out there who had pinned all their hopes on the Kerry/Edwards ticket, truly it was not a good day.

Of course, I don’t have to tell you this, you’ve been running around in your misery for the last few weeks since the election, basking in the delightful suffering of the election loss - so please take this in the spirit it is given: GET THE FUCK OVER IT!

Harsh? Maybe.

Look, Democrats in this country are faced with a tough job at this moment - they need to work harder than ever before. Let’s put it this way, the same effort that went into promoting the Kerry/Edwards ticket was an honest and earnest effort - it’s admirable, it really is! But, now the real job begins and that’s not about giving up. It’s about focusing all that effort onto the mid-term elections in two years and working just as hard for the state and local Democratic candidates on the upcoming ticket.

And let me tell you, I’m speaking as a registered Republican - figure that one out! Truthfully, I can say I’ve never cast a vote for Georgie Junior. As much as he wants to present himself as the standard bearer of the party, the dirty little secret is that there are a lot of moderate Republicans (yes, Democrats - I know you have a lot of trouble believing this but, we are out there) who would’ve been altogether happy to vote for someone other than Junior.

It’s just Kerry wasn’t that guy.

I mean, there are people on the Democratic side I really wish would’ve made the ticket, but they didn’t. Hell, there are some ‘Democrats’ I know who weren’t altogether that comfortable with candidate Kerry - what does that tell you?!?

Do me a favor though. Stop painting Republicans with a broad brush. During the campaign, I heard my party of choice vilified so much so, I almost was at the point of voting for Junior out of spite! Yeah, I can pull the party line lever with the best of them, do I want to? No, but make my party out to be a villain and you’re pushing me into that corner (which I think isn’t such an unusual reaction).

Man, I wish Kerry would’ve wowed me but, honestly when you got right down to it, I couldn’t find anything I was too happy about with his ‘plan for America.’

I think there are a lot of people out there that felt the very same way. Actually, I didn’t seem to pick up that much of a plan other than ‘I’d do the same thing the other guy did but, I’d do it better.’

It just wasn’t enough - and if you hardcore Kerry supporters out there tell me I’m wrong about that, well I guess that means you really didn’t do such a good job getting your message out to me and all those other people that voted.

So, suit yourself if you want, move out of the country, or how about talking about seceding from the union (ignoring the fact that in all 50 states there were people who voted for each of the two major candidates). Better still, just continue to whine and look for ways to blame the people of our country, “They’re stupid,” “Americans suck,” or my personal favorite, “you’ll be sorry.” The election was rigged somehow. I’m sure we’ll be able to obsess about the thousand and one reasons why Kerry didn’t win but, at the end of the day you’re just going to have to get past that.

Obviously something is happening in this country. There seems to be something going on of which we are all aware and truth be told I would hate to see the political pendulum swing too far to the right or to the left which would only happen when people decide they want to separate themselves from the process.

Oh, the election is today - get ready for months of moaning and groaning no matter who wins. The nice thing is though we’ll all still be here four years from now and get another shot at it no matter what some of the alarmists would have you believe.

Ooooo... so busy lately it doesn't ever seem like I have time to think, let alone write.

I've given myself over to silence lately. Usually, I’m one of those people that has to have a TV or radio on to feel comfortable but, with the pace of things lately a few moments of quiet are really necessary.

So much to write about... mmmmmm... where to begin? I know, how about this:

I’ve been fairly busy lately working (which is a story in and of itself). Something that happened the other day made me think about a trend I’ve noticed.

When was the last time you heard someone at your job say, “I don’t know.” Particularly when it involved them performing some kind of work related task or something they would be responsible for - usually it’s a common refrain when you’re asking the person in charge for some time off or for the ability to carry out some personal business - but, when was the last time a co-worker admitted to not being the “Master of the Universe?”

Just curious. Let’s all take a moment if we will and ponder that for a second, okay? Think you can remember hearing it recently at your job?

Anyway, so among the myriad responsibilities I wind up having, is coming in and doing those dirty jobs that nobody really wants to do. Yes, it can be quite tedious but, the pay is good.

Usually, I’ll get handed something a designer has made (oooooohhhh, pretty) but which now has to be used in real world settings by people who don’t care about the nuances of design and are more interested in getting their work done with a minimum of effort.

This entails taking a layout from a program a designer is familiar with (Quark and Illustrator are the most popular culprits), and putting it into some program which every office jockey the world over uses (Word).

Like a lot of other people in my end of the business, I hate all those Microsoft Office programs. They’re a necessary evil. Through the years, I’ve gotten familiar with them but, it’s a grudging familiarity to be sure.

So, this week one of my big projects was to take this design and make a template of it. What happens is once I’ve worked in the program for a few days, I get familiar with all the little tricks and as soon as a week or two passes without using Word, all those little neat tricks vanish from the knowledge base.

I’m in the middle of this thing and of course, like every other project I wind up working on, it was due three weeks ago. Eventually, I run up to this point where I get most everything finished but, there’s still this one thing I can’t quite figure out. Most programs nowadays have extensive help databases (which no one seems to want to use) and before I say I can’t do something, I’ll try typing in every kind of query I can hoping the program will tell me how I can do what I want to do.

Sometimes though it just doesn’t work out.

Now I’m left with two choices, I can say I don’t know how to do something or I can use what is a big tact these days and say it just can’t be done.

So, I say I don’t know.

Fortunately, I know people who might know and it’s only a matter of asking them. So, I tell the person I’m working for that that’s what I’ll do and I’ll find out the answer and get back to them...

...and as luck would have it, people are pretty nice to me about those things and when I send out an email asking for help, I get a bunch of responses a number of which have the answer I need. Lo and behold, problem solved!

So, I finish up the job and after everything is done I just go back and tell the guy everything is finished - it’s been taken care off and is ready to go.

He’s happy (it’s finished), I’m happy (I learned something and a bunch of people came through for me) and it’s one less thing to deal with.

But then, I got to thinking, how many times does someone actually say they don’t know?

Just something to keep in mind, don’t you think?

Bad week for the old folks...

I went to a wake last week. A friend called me Monday because he found out he has to fly out to Chicago to go to an uncle’s funeral this week and the same day I got the news someone else in the family passed - so there’s another wake and a funeral this week.

I don’t feel older but when I was at the wake last week, I was talking to a cousin’s kid (and her husband) who just had their seecond child!!! This relagates me to a generation of grandparents?!?!?!

Stop the clock!

Also, it’s unfortunate because the people who are passing are part of a unique generation and they will be missed.

The fairness in blogging doctrine.

As I had said earlier I’m not particularly crazy about the rhetoric of this campaign (on either side). So in the interest of fairness I thought I would post two emails I received today:

Cheney: Terrorists May Bomb U.S. Cities
By ANDREW WELSH-HUGGINS

CARROLL, Ohio (AP) - Vice President Dick Cheney on Tuesday evoked the possibility of terrorists bombing U.S. cities with nuclear weapons and questioned whether Sen. John Kerry could combat such a threat, which the vice president called a concept “you’ve got to get your mind around.”

“The biggest threat we face now as a nation is the possibility of terrorists ending up in the middle of one of our cities with deadlier weapons than have ever before been used against us - biological agents or a nuclear weapon or a chemical weapon of some kind to be able to threaten the lives of hundreds of thousands of Americans,” Cheney said.

“That’s the ultimate threat. For us to have a strategy that’s capable of defeating that threat, you’ve got to get your mind around that concept,” Cheney said.

Cheney, speaking to an invitation-only crowd as he began a bus tour through Republican strongholds in Ohio, said Kerry is trying to convince voters he would be the same type of “tough, aggressive” leader as President Bush in the fight against terrorism. “I don’t believe it,” the vice president said. “I don’t think there’s any evidence to support the proposition that he would, in fact, do it.”

Cheney praised the recent elections in Afghanistan but said they don't mean the U.S. mission there is finished.

“Does that mean it’s over now and we can walk away? No, it doesn’t,” he said. “This is three yards and a cloud of dust. There’s no touchdown passes in this business. We’ll stay as long as we need to help them train their own security forces, which we’re doing actively so they can take over responsibility for their own security.”

In a campaign appearance Monday in Johnstown, Pa., Cheney criticized rival vice presidential candidate John Edwards for going “overboard” in his comments about Kerry’s support of unrestricted federal funding for stem cell research, which Bush and Cheney oppose. He also accused Edwards of giving people “false hope.”

Edwards told supporters in Newton, Iowa, on Oct. 11, “If we do the work that we can do in this country, the work that we will do when John Kerry is president, people like Christopher Reeve will get up out of that wheelchair and walk again.” The actor, a quadriplegic who became an advocate for stem cell research, had died a day earlier.

“I thought, frankly, the other day what John Edwards suggested when he made his comments about Christopher Reeve, that somehow if John Kerry were president, Christopher Reeve could get up out of his wheelchair and there all of his problems would be solved, I really thought was an inappropriate remark, especially given... well, given the false hope it engendered,”
Cheney said.

and then I also received this email...

“One way or the other, we are determined to deny Iraq the capacity to develop weapons of mass destruction and the missiles to deliver them. That is our bottom line.” — President Clinton, Feb. 4, 1998

“If Saddam rejects peace and we have to use force, our purpose is clear. We  want to seriously diminish the threat posed by Iraq’s weapons of mass destruction program.” — President Clinton, Feb. 17, 1998

Iraq is a long way from [here],! but what happens there matters a great deal here. For the risks that the leaders of a rogue state will use nuclear, chemical or biological weapons against us or our allies is the greatest security threat we face.” — Madeline Albright, Feb 18, 1998

“He will use those weapons of mass destruction again, as he has ten time since 1983.” — Sandy Berger, Clinton National Security Adviser, Feb,18,1998

“We urge you, after consulting with Congress, and consistent with the U.S. Constitution and laws, to take necessary actions (including, if appropriate, air and missile strikes on suspect Iraqi sites) to respond effectively to the threat posed by Iraq’s refusal to end its weapons of mass destruction programs.” — Letter to President Clinton, signed by Sens. Carl Levin (D-MI), Tom Daschle (D-SD), John Kerry( D - MA), and others Oct. 9, 1998

“Saddam Hussein has been engaged in the development of weapons of mass destruction technology which is a threat to countries in the region and he has made a mockery of the weapons inspection process.” — Rep. Nancy Pelosi  (D,CA), Dec. 16, 1998

“Hussein has chosen to spend his money on building weapons of mass destruction and palaces for his cronies.” — Madeline Albright, Clinton  Secretary of State, Nov. 10, 1999

“There is no doubt that Saddam Hussein has invigorated his weapons programs. Reports indicate that biological, chemical and nuclear programs continue at  apace and may be back to pre-Gulf War status. In addition, Saddam continues to redefine delivery systems and is doubtless using the cover of an illicit missile program to develop longer-range missiles that will threaten the United States and our allies.” — Letter to President  Bush, Signed by Sen. Bob Graham (D, FL,) and others, Dec  5, 2001

“We begin with the common belief that Saddam Hussein is a tyrant and threat to the peace and stability of the region. He has ignored the mandated of the United Nations and is building weapons of mass destruction and the means of delivering them.” — Sen. Carl Levin (D,  MI), Sept. 19, 2002

“We know that he has stored secret supplies of biological and chemical  Weapons throughout his country.” — Al Gore, Sept. 23, 2002

“Iraq’s search for weapons of mass destruction has proven impossible to deter and we should assume that it will continue for as long as Saddam is in power.” — Al Gore, Sept. 23, 2002

“We have known for many years that Saddam Hussein is seeking and developing weapons of mass destruction.” — Sen. Ted Kennedy (D,  MA), Sept. 27,2002

“The last UN weapons inspectors left Iraq in October of 1998. We are confident that Saddam Hussein retains some stockpiles of chemical and biological weapons, and that he has since embarked on a crash course to build up his chemical and biological warfare capabilities. Intelligence reports indicate that he is seeking nuclear weapons...” — Sen. Robert Byrd (D,  WV), Oct. 3, 2002

“I will be voting to give the President of the United States the authority to use force if necessary to disarm Saddam Hussein because believe that a deadly arsenal of weapons of mass destruction in his hands is a real and grave threat to our security.” — Sen. John F. Kerry (D, MA), Oct. 9, 2002

“There is unmistakable evidence that Saddam Hussein is working aggressively to develop nuclear weapons and will likely have nuclear weapons within the next five years... We also should remember we have always underestimated the progress Saddam has made in development of weapons of mass destruction.” — Sen. Jay Rockefeller (D, WV), Oct 10, 2002

“He has systematically violated, over the course of the past 11 years, every significant UN resolution that has demanded that he disarm and destroy his chemical and biological weapons, and any nuclear capacity. This he has refused to do” — Rep. Henry Waxman (D, CA), Oct. 10, 2002

“In the four years since the inspectors left, intelligence reports show that Saddam Hussein has worked to rebuild his chemical and biological weapons stock, his missile delivery capability, and his nuclear program. He  has also given aid, comfort, and sanctuary to terrorists, including al Qaeda members... It is clear, however, that if left unchecked, Saddam Hussein will continue to increase his capacity to wage biological and chemical warfare, and will keep trying to develop nuclear weapons.” — Sen. Hillary Clinton (D, NY), Oct 10, 2002

“We are in possession of what I think to be compelling evidence that Saddam  Hussein has, and has had for a number of years, a developing capacity for the production and storage of weapons of mass destruction.” — Sen. Bob Graham  (D,FL), Dec. 8, 2002

“Without question, we need to disarm Saddam Hussein. He is a brutal, murderous dictator, leading an oppressive regime... He presents a particularly grievous threat because he is so consistently prone to miscalculation... And now he is miscalculating America's response to his continued deceit and his consistent grasp for weapons of mass destruction... So the threat of Saddam Hussein with weapons of mass destruction is real” — Sen. John F. Kerry  (D, MA),Jan.23. 2003

SO NOW THESE SAME DEMOCRATS SAY PRESIDENT BUSH LIED — THAT THERE NEVER WERE ANY WEAPONS OF MASS  DESTRUCTION AND HE TOOK US TO WAR UNNECESSARILY!

Send this to everybody you know... The networks won’t  do it (Fox excluded).  Its up to us to get the word out...

Quick! Let’s get Goosey Lucy! The Sky is falling! The Sky is falling!

“I thought he was maybe a parole officer or something. I let him in the building,” says Cepeda, the superintendent at 1220 Seneca Ave. “I didn't pay him no mind.”

The next day Cepeda saw the paramedics carrying the man out of apartment 4B, trying to revive him but knowing there was no use.

“They said he was already dead,” Cepeda says.

Diatribe Sunday

There have been a number of occasions over the last several weeks where I’ve started to write something only to lose my train of thought, get interrupted or have the computer crash.

Maybe today, I’ll manage to soldier through...

The Election.

There’s been a lot of ink devoted to the election over the last several weeks. Every four years the people of this country become obsessed with the political version of Survivor. No doubt, the reason why the reality show is so successful is in that it mirrors the presidential primaries and campaigns.

Just a few short months ago, we watched as Howard Dean’s scream in a moment of passion became his undoing and four years from now one wonders if it’ll be more than a footnote of the current campaign. Howard Dean fades into the ranks of those who tried for the brass ring and self destructed (let’s dig up images of Gary Hart and his playful boat rides).

I’m admittedly a bit of a cynic when it comes to these things. I can’t say I’ve been really satisfied by the positions of either of the two major parties over the last several years. There are points on both sides which have captured my heart and then there are points where they both have totally lost me.

So, there are only a few weeks left before I walk in and close that curtain and I can’t say I’ll be really sure what I’ll do until I close the that curtain behind me.

I will say that I followed most of the debates and came away very disappointed.

I listened to the first half of the first debate on the radio as I was on my way home from work.

Listening to the debate was a good thing as I was spared the posturing the candidates feel compelled to do on TV - makes me think everyone in the nation would be better served if the debates were televised but the candidates visages weren’t shown (I don’t know maybe put a picture of each guy up as he is speaking).

The thing that stuck with me was in a nation as large as ours these two are the best we can come up with?! How sad.

Also, doesn’t it appear that the nature of the campaigns has changed dramatically over the last fifty years? How much of an influence (and a negative one at that) does TV have on these things today?

Another thing that also interested me was that MTV, MTV2, BET and VH1 all networks which have been running campaigns endeavoring to get people out and vote decided not to carry the debates live. I guess Pimp My Ride is really the choice of likely young voters??

I hate public restrooms - work restrooms are one step below a public restroom in a lot of ways...

What’s the protocol for a workplace restroom?

When you find yourself in the restroom and a co-worker is also there at the same moment is it appropriate to conduct a conversation? I myself find it really difficult to suppress a guffaw when someone is ensconced in a stall trying mightily to conduct business. Also, it somehow takes prestige away from a manager or company president when you catch them in the stall with their pants down.

Years ago when I was at Grey there was a co-worker who was as regular as clockwork and made no secret of it by proudly announcing his foray to the lavatory and emphasizing the point by taking along reading material.

I don’t know why this comes up outside of the fact I’m really bored at work today and I just came back from a visit to the bathroom where someone was at the throne - I always feel this impetus to clear out as quickly as possible before things get really ugly and then I almost broke out laughing as the occupant was trying to stifle the sounds of the process.

I had a bill come today.

I think the bill illustrates just what is wrong with the country. Sometimes, I hear people justify income taxes as opposed to a national sales tax saying that a national sales tax is just unfair.

The truth is, if we only had to pay income tax it wouldn’t be so bad but, there are so many other taxes we wind up paying each and every day and often we have just become so numb to everything we don’t even begin to realize just how much money goes out of one’s pocket in taxes.

Anyway, so I got a bill from my long-distance carrier on my home phone. I haven’t used the home phone as much for long distance since nights and weekends long distance on the cell is free.

Here’s what the bill was:

One call - for one minute (it was probably less than a minute as I remember who I was calling and if I remember correctly they didn’t pick up but somehow I got charged for it anyway.

The total for the bill is $3.70!

...but wait there’s more. The charge for the phone call was .40¢

0.40 phone call
______________

0.99 carrier cost recovery
1.76 in-state access recovery
________________________________

0.10 state gross receipts surcharge
0.10 county sales tax
0.13 state sales tax
0.13 carrier universal service charge
0.09 federal excise tax
__________________________

So, a 40¢ call wound up costing me an additional $3.30 in other charges. F**k fuzzy math! Imagine going to the store, paying $2.20 for a quart of milk and paying $18.50 in additional charges (I did the math, proportionally that’s what it works out to).

Something is very wrong.

ü

The job I quit

So, I quit this job recently...

It was a really crappy job and I had had the job for a very long time (something like 12 years).

The hours were long, there was no pay to speak of, no job satisfaction and because of this job I sacrificed many of the things that were important in my life. The job took precedence over everything other aspect of my life and I felt I was obligated to stay. No matter how much I grew to despise the job, it was a responsibility I felt I couldn’t shirk. I have to admit, it was a burden and it made me feel trapped. It held me back from growing as a person and ultimately was bad for me both mentally and physically.

Recently, a day came where I realized I could quit. It had never occurred to me before or if it had I had dismissed it out of hand. That was my fault. There is no question about it, and I’m still trying to understand why it took so long for me to realize that simple fact. Something about it seemed wrong, I don’t know if it was the quitting itself or the walking away but, you can only bang your head against a wall for so long until you beat yourself senseless or finally wake up and come to the simple fact that beating your head against a wall does one little good.

Everyone deserves some kind of happiness and I guess I had bought into the company line for so long I thought somehow I was undeserving but, there was that epiphany.

So, over the last two weeks or so I have set about working at a new job. The job is taking better care of myself and treating myself right. This will be a very hard job for me to be successful at. I am sure there will be times when I will not do as well at this job as I should be doing but, I think it is worth the effort. The good thing of course is that if I am successful there will be a great many changes in my life and all of them will be for the better.

File under Hot For Teacher



Tampa middle school teacher Debra Beasley Lafave turned herself in to Marion County authorities Monday, as investigators there released details of her alleged sexual relations with a 14-year-old student.

The 14-year-old told detectives he and Lafave, 23, engaged in oral sex or sexual intercourse at three locations: in her portable classroom at Greco Middle School in Tampa, at her Riverview apartment and in her sport-utility vehicle while his cousin drove around Ocala earlier this month.

Here’s the difference between the genders - for a majority of 14 year old boys this is a dream come true, the only rub is mom finding out and teach getting busted, it probably ruined the summer of his dreams. I can’t speak to the age difference (I’ve dated people more than nine years older than me and more than nine years younger than me too) but, that’s one good looking woman! I guess there really is some limited equality between the sexes when women are as capable of being driven by their libido as men are. Of course, what would the slant be if it were a 23 year old male teacher and a 14 year old female student.

Kind of reminds me of Jenny McCarthy though (the face that is).

I was strolling through "the archives" just getting a sense of how long I’ve been doing this without doing any real writing when I came across this:

Back End of the Batmobile: The state of your Brass Eye soon after a really hot curry. “I had a Ring Stinger in the Benghazi restaurant last night, and now I’ve got a dose of Gandhi’s Revenge. My arse feels like the back end of the Batmobile.”

Lots of wonderful British slang I never knew.

Elmer Bernstein is a name in music synonymous with creativity, versatility and longevity. The year 2001 marked his 50th anniversary as a feature film composer who has written the music for over 200 major film and television scores, the only composer working today to have achieved such longevity. He has practiced his craft for the past half century, gracing virtually all creative media with his work.

You may have heard much of Elmer Bernstein’s music:

The lighthearted, mysterious piano from Ghostbusters, that was him.

The exciting horns trumpeting adventure in the National Geographic theme, that was him too.

Although he passed almost a month ago, it would be a crime not to note his passing, a man who left behind an incredible body of work (check out the website linked above) you may find you’ve enjoyed his compositions more than once without knowing who he was.

I can’t help it, watching The Weather Channel and the news the last several days, all I can keep thinking about is this song.

Matt showed me this years ago, it’s very funny and worth watching if you have the bandwidth.–

I just couldn’t let another day pass without mentioning Bienville Books:

Russ Adams opened Bienville Books about 14 months ago and made his first sale: a used Dictionary of Mathematical Terms.

A math professor had died and part of the estate acquired by Adams included the dictionary, other professional texts and a bunch of NASA manuals from the 1970s.

It’s the type of eclectic inventory that Adams hopes will keep the only bookshop downtown thriving in a struggling retail market. What he doesn’t sell over the counter is offered to buyers shopping on the Internet, he said.

“People don’t come here for best sellers,” Adams said of comparisons to the big-chain book dealers in the malls. “I get a lot of requests for cookbooks, out-of-print Mobile and Alabama books. It’s kind of fun.”

Russ is someone I’ve known now for over 20 years. He was my entry into a world of friends I would‘ve never made if not for him. He blazed a bunch of trails, being the first person I knew to support himself by freelancing with his Mac (a IIFx) and then trying his hand at writing out in Hollywood.

Some of my best times have been spent in his company and in our mutual inebriation. Recently, he popped up to NYC for a visit and it was good seeing him. He had returned to his roots and seemed in the best spirits I had seen him in in some time. I wish him and the bookstore much success.

A week from this coming Saturday is my birthday. It also happens to be Yom Kippur the Jewish Day of Atonement:

The name “Yom Kippur” means “Day of Atonement,” and that pretty much explains what the holiday is. It is a day set aside to “afflict the soul,” to atone for the sins of the past year. In Days of Awe, I mentioned the “books” in which G-d inscribes all of our names. On Yom Kippur, the judgment entered in these books is sealed. This day is, essentially, your last appeal, your last chance to change the judgment, to demonstrate your repentance and make amends.

The last few years, I have tried ignoring my birthday. I can’t explain why I feel the way I do but, I often find the occasion a bit of a disappointment.

I was thinking the other day how somewhere in my early 30’s birthdays became less about celebrating and more about looking at all the things in life I have unfinished or unfulfilled. The last few years haven’t been easy when it comes to b-days, I can’t think of one since we entered the new millennium which has come at a good time.

Four years ago (in 2000), my birthday fell at the end of one of the most arduous six months I have ever lived through - between getting hit by a bicyclist, watching one client fold and another move rapidly in the same direction, injuring my hand, being told I had cancer, watching my uncle pass and then having surgery myself to remove a “mass.”

Three years ago (2001), we had the whole September 11th thing and I can’t really say it was much the time for celebrating (although I do remember having a very nice dinner at Lupa - taking a cab down Houston Street and seeing all the heavy equipment lined up for the salvage of Ground Zero.

Two years ago (2002), there was another personal crisis that had ended before the b-day.

...and last year (2003), my partner of seven years decided it was time for us to split.

As I write it though, I have to admit, I find myself laughing. I’m still here so in the inimitable and indomitable spirit I find myself saying fuck it.

This year, regardless of the irony of the bday falling on the “Day of Atonement,” I think I’ll go back to my original plans of those bdays of my early 30’s and just try to ignore it and have a good day.

Besides, if I can do the things I want to with this year, maybe next year I’ll have a lot more worth celebrating..

I heard this on the Howard Stern show the other day and it is funny!

“Too many good docs are getting out of the business. Too many OB-GYNs aren’t able to practice their love with women all across this country.”

Now hop up into the stirrups ladies and be afraid... be very afraid!

(you can see the video of it through the link as well)

And while we’re on the subject of dicks...

Don’t let the door hit you on the way out, Art Howe is rumored to be fired after the last day of the season. Howe is rumored to be a nice man (and I have no reason to think otherwise) but, after suffering fthrough the last two seasons of watching him manage the Mets it can’t happen soon enough. Admittedly, the team he was handed was hampered by injuries throughout the course of this season but, it’s been painful to watch the Mets and some of his moves have left quite a number of Mets fans scratching their heads trying to figure out what he was hoping to accomplish (winning games certainly wasn’t the goal).

Now, if the Wilpons could just swallow their pride and get Bobby V back, he never should have been fired in the first place!

Shocking!

I post this for my cousin Jill and her cousin Tina who traumatized me when I was at the tender age of 11 by seizing my Big Jim action figure and trying to find out if it was anatomically correct (it wasn’t). I’m sure since that time she’s satisfied her curiousity but nonetheless if she hasn’t this should do the trick.

Courtesy of Warren Ellis’ Die Puny Humans blog.

Today is that day again.

Three years since that fateful day, that beautiful morning when the sky was crystal clear, the temperature just so, a total contrast to what would later unfold.

As it recedes, it has less impact which is a sign of healing - which is good. Something that should never be forgotten but, simultaneously something which shouldn't prevent us from moving forward.

While much of the focus is on Ground Zero and the Pentagon and the destruction in both places, the one thing that stands out in my mind is the sacrifice made by a group of ordinary Americans.

(9:47 a.m.): On Flight 93, Jeremy Glick is still on the phone with his wife Lyz. He tells her that the passengers are taking a vote if they should try to take over the plane or not. [About the same time as a different phone call, Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, 10/28/01 , Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, 10/28/01 (B) ] He later says that all the men on the plane have voted to attack the hijackers. [No time marker, Toronto Sun, 9/16/01 ] When asked about weapons, he says they don't have guns, just knives. His wife Lyz got the impression from him that the hijacker standing nearby claiming to hold the bomb would be easy to overwhelm. [Among the Heroes,
by Jere Longman, 8/02, p. 153-154]

When faced with the realization that they were confronting a situation which would cost them their lives, this disparate group found the one thing which united them. Different creeds, faiths, ethnicity but bound together by the fact that they were Americans, they voted about what course of action they would take and they chose to sacrifice themselves so their fellow citizens would be spared. Ordinary men and women who made a choice to stand and fight.

9:54 a.m.: Tom Burnett calls his wife Deena for the fourth and last time. In early reports of this call, he says, “I know we're all going to die. There's three of us who are going to do something about it.” [No time marker, Toronto Sun, 9/16/01 , no time marker, Boston Globe, 11/23/01 ] However, in a later and much more complete account, he sounds much more upbeat. “It's up to us. I think we can do it.” “Don't worry, we're going to do something.” He specifically mentions they plan to regain control of the airplane over a rural area. [9:54, “again Deena noted the time,” Among the Heroes, by Jere Longman, 8/02, p. 118]

Maybe I’m a cornball but, I’d like to think that this is what it means for us to be Americans. When faced with plane crashes, blackouts or horrible catastrophes we rise to the occasion and help the people around us putting aside whatever divides us and treating each other the way we should treat each other every day.

If there is one lesson we can take with us from that horrible day three years ago let it be that.

If you dropped by in the last day or so, things probably looked a little strange. It's amazing the havoc an odd, misplaced space or two can do.

I haven't written much about baseball lately. It's just been a lost season as I've been watching the Mets put the uck in suck this year.

It's a hollow victory having the vindication that Bobby Valentine should have never been fired and Art Howe wasn't the right choice for this team.

Art will be gone before next year, as the end of the season winds down and the losses mount up it just brings the inevitable firing closer and closer.

On the bright side, David Wright looks really good and Jose Reyes will be back at short so the left side of the infield is young and possibly could be great for the next five or six years. John Franco and Al Leiter should be gone by next season and that will help too. I imagine Mike Stanton will be gone as well and honestly, since I never really liked him I couldn't be happier.

Yet, under the radar, the Mets signed a Cuban pitcher this week and have an inside track on a 21 year old Cuban first baseman so it looks like the infield will be set for years to come.

So, it's the old Dodgers lament again this season, wait until next year. I'll just have to be content in watching the Yankees set new records for the worst loss in baseball history in the last century (almost), or watch as the store bought team of all-stars that the Georgie-boy assembled turns out to be a wash.

You know, for all their vaunted success the Yankees haven't won a world series since they faced the Mets in 2000. They've been twice and lost (Diamondbacks and Marlins) and got knocked out in playoffs in-between (Angels).

As that 2000 subway series gets further back in the rear view mirror of Yankee history, I have a greater appreciation of that team of the late 90's. They weren't an assemblage of stars as much as a unique combination of personalities and abilities that complemented each other.

The Yankees of 2004 don't come close to the late 90's teams even on their best day..

The battle of the Bees - part two

So, for the last six weeks or so, there's been an internecine war going on.

A few years back it was the battle of me against the ants. We had ants somehow (which I'm sure we still do) but, after much work and a herculean effort I managed to turn the tide of the battle in my favor.

Seems the ants had taken up residence in the hollow recesses of an Ikea veneer table (a word to the wise for all of you Ikea owners out there). The dark cavernous space in the center of the table was determined to be the prime real estate by the ants.

Leaving the table top out by the curb removed the problem and allowed me to be the ultimate victor - someone made off with the table before the garbagemen but, you take your chances when you go furniture shopping among the refuse.

Back to the bees...

So, in relatively the same place the ant battle began, another species found the ants handiwork and tried claiming it for their own (whether this meant there was a huge but unseen battle between the two colonies of insects or not, I have no clue).

Several weeks ago, while sitting up in what I would refer to as "the dining area," I became aware of a squadron of bees having invaded. Needless to say I was both surprised and alarmed - thinking at first they had somehow found their way into the attic, I made my way up there to see if I could find their base of operations but was unsuccessful.

Short work was made of the squadron with weapons of mass destruction in the form of insect spray but, ever since that day a scout or two would appear several times each day.

A survey of the outside of the building disclosed an egress point from which numerous little critters could be seen making their way out into the world doing the business of the hive.

This resulted in more weapons of mass destruction being used on the exterior of the house. Unfortunately, it was to no avail.

Fearing the intervention of the insect world's equivalent of a major super power invading my home and deposing me, I had to find a stopgap measure until the winter effectively stymied my foes.

The answer came in the form of something I saw on "This Old House." Insulation in a can - an expanding foam which is injected from a can much the way the compressed air is delivered to clear office equipment. The foam is injected into the crevice, expands, cures and hardens. Future generations will be able to find the handiwork of my bee genocide as my victims will be frozen in the foam. A grisly fate to be sure but, decisions had to be made, steps had to be taken.

Personally, there's a lot to do around here to fix things up but my hands are tied by the EYOC who is terrified of relinquishing any kind of control so, the house crumbles around us in the meantime..